Tag: baseball
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Baseballs Underperforming Early On in Spring Training
With the lockout taking away the majority of the offseason and a lot of precious prep time, everyone is scrambling to get up to speed in the short window before Opening Day. And not just the players, coaches, and executives — the baseballs themselves are feeling this time crunch as well. Typically, Major League baseballs […]
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Well, it’s Groundhog Day…Again
Rob Manfred woke up this morning, as he has every morning for the last…..who knows, really? He grabbed his cold milk with a splash of warm coffee, took a seat in his ergonomic chair in front of his comically large desk, and got to work. Well, he calls it work. It is something. But it’s […]
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Donations and Dingers: A Recap of the Trident Deck Charity Wiffle Ball Home Run Derby
On Saturday September 18th, 16 brave souls and a smattering of familial onlookers gathered on a sloppy baseball field in the city of Kent, WA to experience the thrill of plastic-on-plastic power surges and friendly competition. An event two months in the making was finally actualized, and even the disgusting weather took a break out […]
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A Much-Deserved Reward
I politely remind my daughter to eat her dinner. It is five microwaved dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets, and a handful of grapes. It is what she requested. It’s been sitting next to her for ten minutes, as she stares at the television where talking ponies with tattoos on their haunches are tackling some new dilemma through […]
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UPDATE: First Annual Trident Deck Charity Wiffle Ball Home Run Derby
WHEN: Saturday, September 18th! For those of you who can’t make it this date, I’m truly bummed but it looks like this will be best overall. We’re looking at an 11 am start time. WHERE: North Meridian Park in Kent! SE 230th StKent, WA 98031United States CHARITY: The most important part. Very excited to announce […]
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THE MARINERS LINEUP, SOLVED. A TRIDENT DECK EXCLUSIVE
This week, reading the internet, it seems to be Mariner Optimal Lineup Season (or szn for the hipper cats and kittens). And please believe we have A Take. Digging through the baseball internet of yore, I unearthed a lineup optimizer from the bush-era-web. The following datums were plugged into the machine, and I let the […]
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INTENTIONAL ACTS OF TRIDENT(ness): Let’s have some fun.
Howdy Deckies! TL;DR Let’s have some baseball adjacent fun. Trident Deck will be running two fantasy baseball leagues (one traditional, one WeirdAss) for you, the Deckies, the Deckie-curious, and any merry pranksters you may know. Having made the term “deckie” (Tridentor? Deckhand? Idk we’ll make it up as we go) up seconds ago and seeing […]
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The Mariners Don’t Need a Scapegoat. They Need a Reckoning
The villain has been vanquished. There is no work left to do now, only celebration. The one and only enemy is gone. Rest now, child. And enjoy Mariners baseball tomorrow. That is the future the Seattle Mariners want. The fans and players have rallied together, and now the team desperately wants to rally around the […]
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Mariners Apology Translator
In the aftermath of Kevin Mather lighting himself and the organization on fire, the team finally managed to release an official statement on Monday, via this clean-looking graphic. The statement is allegedly to be read in the voice of John Stanton. He said some words, and some of them presumably meant something. Parsing through official […]
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James Paxton is Back, Which Means I Can Finally Look at a Maple Bar Without Crying Again
Finally. Do you have any idea how hard it’s been, any time I go into [well-known local donut establishment] and see those big, beautiful, brownish glazed pastries staring back at me? I think to myself, wow that is a big maple b— big maple? BIG MAPLE!!! I erupt in sobs and crumple to the floor. […]
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