Author: Brian Tesch
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PART 3/4: THE BASEBALL FOLKS WHO FIT OUR MODERN AND MORE INCLUSIVE DEFINITION OF ADOLESCENCE UNDER EMPLOY BY THE MARINERS AT THIS TIME, EVALUATED AND JUDGED!
OPEN WIDE FOR SOME PROSPECTS*! *prospect a subjective term what may constitute a prospect to this The Blog Of Record may not fit your definition. FRONTLINE TALENT GRADE: C SUPPORT TALENT GRADE: B- (See part 2). UPPER MINORS GRADE: C A revelation, a scouting favorite, and a whole lotta cope. LOWER MINORS GRADE: B Rowdy […]
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SEASON PREVIEW PART 2/4: LOIN GIRDERS, THE MARINER SUPPORT.
Hi Sicko Deckie Faction! You made it through to the mid catalog! Maribertastic! Your reward is More Content, this time centered around what at the time of this writing, project to be the periphery of BigLeague Marineria. FRONTLINE TALENT GRADE: C (See part 1) SUPPORT TALENT GRADE: B- (This is the strength of the team. […]
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SEASON PREVIEW PART 1/4: THE VIEW FROM THE FRONTLINE
Hi Deckies! It’s your once quarterly pal Brian here! The state Poasting Board came through and stated we needed to do one post per year to renew our Failure In Analysis License in Washington State so dag nabbit, let’s get it over with and smile for the DMV camera. Here it is! The series nobody […]
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What Remains of The Hot Stove Part 1 of IDK
So it seems the contingent of 30 Large Wet And Self Important Adults who own Major League Baseball teams have decided the equilibrium price for labor has climbed too high for SuperDuperUltraWineClubOnLittleSaintJames membership, and have taken their hair plugs and gone home until the baseballguyrabble is pacified. For me, this is a bummer! Secretly I […]
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BREAKING: Baseball Embraces The Bold Future! Bazinga!
Announced Thursday, the professional sports league formerly known as Major League Baseball will now be known as Major League Baseball Presented By BazingaBuxxxACurrencyForANewGeneration (MLBazingaBuxxx). Sources say that the final sticking point for BazingaBuxxx(A Currency For A New Generation) was the abbreviation shifting from MLB to MLBazingaBuxxx and insertion of “Buxxx” replacing “Flag” in the National […]
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We Have Players At Home: Self Scouting The 2021 Mariners Of Note
Howdy Deckies! Seen a lot of coveting thy neighbors dudes ‘round these pixelated parts and thought, hey, why not go in the opposite direction. With the impending “The Imminently Forgettable 1% Take Their Ball And Go Home,” looking to put a kibosh on those tasty, tasty yellow hot stove onions, it’s time to Take A […]
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Rays $/fWAR Championship Parade Draws 0.000012 Million Fans
An estimated (fractional) million fans jammed downtown Tampa (or St Pete, it’s not actually Tampa; we’re not sure) on Tuesday for a parade celebrating the Tampa Bay Rays sixth $/fWAR title, clamoring for more with cheers of “We want seven!”, “Pivot This, Oakland!” and “Next year, right here, or Montreal, I guess!” A fiscally responsible […]
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The Plan.
Hi Deckies, it’s the October Sky On VHS and Worksheet Day portion of the blog here to get at ya again. YOWZA picked a bad month to have quit smoking for quite some time! Right! But in all seriousness, potentially it was how close the team was to mathematical elimination in mid-September which primed the […]
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JULY AUTO RE-ORDER
TL;DR It was a fun month. Let’s gather around the TridentFire and say mostly nice things about the baseball team. Call your parents and/or your friends and say something nice. The second installment of the overcaffeinated-budget-helicopter tour all Mariber no one asked for, but a select few seem to enjoy, is here! It took longer […]
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YACHT ROCK: RUMINATIONS ON 80 ODD BASEBALL GAMES
Hi Deckies! The erstwhite Blog Governor has glued himelf to himself in the name of Science, so it’s time to give you the textual equivalent of “rolling out the tv and playing October Sky”. To the fan of The Auto ReOrder, pipe down my piglet(s), you’ll get your Overcaffinated Helicopter Tour Of The Mariner in […]
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